Fussypants is Crazy Times Four! Make that Five?

Guest post by Megan from Velveteen Mind

***BABY UPDATE @ 1:12pm***

*UPDATE*  via Karla's twitter stream @ http://twitter.com/karpo:

Babyboy #5 was born at 12:15! He's blonde and weighed 7# 8oz!

She is resting now and both are doing very well!

*********

My eyes are not supposed to be open at 2 a.m.  However, they popped open this morning at just that time so that I could pick up my cell phone to check for any missed calls from Karla.  She of Mrs. Fussypants's hospital bedside patrol.  She of birth canal reporting duty.  She of Mr. Smartypants's insistent contributions-to-overpopulation-efforts recording position.

Alas, no phone call.  In fact, still no phone call as I write this.  So, I sit, watching the clock, wondering exactly when an "appropriate" hour to call a newly crowned mother-to-five would be.  Does Mrs. Fussypants prefer to have her makeup and hair done, pearls gracing her neck, before she talks on the phone?

I kid you not.  Alli told me should would be Fighting the Frump all the way to the pearls in the delivery room.

As I picture Alli bringing another little gentleman into the world, my thoughts return to the thoughts that I entertained at 2 a.m. this morning, as I grumped to myself about when I would hear about the new baby Fussypants...

My favorite days are birth days.  Love them.  Adore them.  I, dare say, relish them.  If I could skip the first month of pregnancy and the first six months of sleepless new-baby nights, I would give birth a dozen times more.  As it is, I have only enjoyed two, so far.

Yeah, I'm one of those moms-- the ones whose births are quick and relatively easy.  Ish.  But I promise, I make up for it by nearly dying during the first month of pregnancy, including having kidney stones, refusing any medication to relieve that pain, not being able to keep anything down and also not being able to keep from peeing every single time I'm not able to keep anything down.  So, yeah, I pay my dues early and up front.

But I love being pregnant.  And I adore giving birth.

My first baby was Mr. Pants.  We call him Pants for short.  We had him while Maguire, my husband, was in law school in New Orleans.  I was due during the final exams of his second year and whatever else happened, I was not to give birth before those were over.

Twenty minutes after he walked out the door for his last exam, I went into labor.

My in-laws drove over from Mobile and escorted me to the hospital while Maguire was burning up the #2 pencils over at Loyola, blissfully unaware that I was preparing to bring our first baby into the world.  The hospital confirmed I was in labor, but allowed me to go home until I was really ready.

I had taken Lamaze classes and made it through the day with relative ease, feeling as though I could hold out on going back to the hospital until little hands started poking out.  As night fell and all four of our parents, now safely by our side in New Orleans, began pacing the house and loading the car, I stood out on our front porch and declared that I was going to bed, as I was not having a baby that night.

An hour later, I was in the hospital listening to the distinct popwoosh of my water breaking, nay exploding.  Mr. Pants was on his way.

I was in active labor with that first little stinker for about four hours, pushed for perhaps twenty minutes.   Yes, the pain was bad enough to wrack my body uncontrollably, but I knew what I was doing and actually felt in control of the birthing bit.

I will never forget what it felt like during that final push.  The one that separated me from my baby but joined us eye-to-eye for the rest of our lives.  It was delicious.  It was satisfying.  It was what I was born to do.

I was born to be a mother.

There was a moment, weeks after Pants was born, that I was rocking him in his tiny little converted-closet nursery in our New Orleans shotgun home during which I physically felt my heart pouring out into his as I cradled him.  How do you explain that?  How can you anticipate that?

You simply can not.

Our second baby was a Hurricane Baby.  After Hurricane Katrina, I was far from organized and far from logical, prone to being swept away by emotions of every nature.  Mother Nature took advantage of that and slipped us a little surprise named Goose.

This time around, my husband was studying for the BAR exam and whatever else happened, I was not to give birth until after he was done studying. 

Twelve hours after he said he was done studying, I went into labor.

The power of our minds is incalculable.

At 2 a.m., in the guest house that was our temporary home, I was just wrapping up some work online when I felt the first familiar pressure of a new life ready to make his entrance into our world.

Heaven laughed at all semblance of control this time.  Two hours later, I was in the hospital being told that our on-call doctor was going to give my OB a little more "beauty sleep" before he called her in.  Twenty minutes later, a nurse fiercely whispered across the room, "Get any doctor in here right now!"  She then proceeded to beg me not to push.

Right.  I'm not the one pushing, dear, it is my baby and he's coming out one way or another.

Moments later, some random doctor was dragged out of the showers (I am seriously not kidding), scrubs slapped on, hair still wet under his scrub cap, and directed my way.  As he sat down in front of me, he suggested that I let go and let my body push, as I was more or less levitating at this point from the pain of an unnaturally quick labor. 

He was literally still in the process of sitting down as my baby Goose shot out of my body in one explosive push and was caught mid-air by this wet and bewildered doctor.   At least I hope he was a doctor.  He could have been the janitor.  All he needed to be was a baseball catcher, however.

The man didn't even charge us for the delivery.  He said, "All I did was catch."

The delicious fierce warmth of a new baby.  I feel drunk thinking about it.

As I sit here and watch the minutes tick by, I wonder if Alli has had that baby, yet.  Given that she has utterly lost all semblance of sanity and is bringing a fifth baby into the world, I hope that her birthing skills are similar to mine, in that these kids sort of walk out of the birth canal on their own. 

But I wonder, is she still in labor?  Are Pitocin drips that painful?  What the heck is going on up there?  When is my phone going to ring?  Can I call, yet?

And I think about giving birth.  And I watch my not-so-baby boys run around and ask for cake and ice cream at 8 in the morning.  I think about the complex shifts that must be made in the days after bringing that new baby home.  Of trying to take showers with a squalling baby in a bouncy seat on the floor in front of you.  Of sore nipples and raw bums.

I think of that strangely empty feeling in our bellies, as we hold what was once warming our inside and is now warming our outside.

I think of our heart's capacity to expand and bloom and absorb another life. 

And I marvel at the fact that Alli has done this five times.

Or has she still only done it four?  Hello?  Come in, Nashville? 

If I don't hear from you soon, I'm loading my babies and my itching ovaries into the car and driving up there.  Because I have a crazy urge to hold me some Fussy baby.

And to kiss Mrs. Fussypants on her beautimous face.  Because I love her.  Adore her.  And thank her for sharing her life.  In every sense of the word.

Come visit me at Velveteen Mind, if you haven't already.  I know Fussypants links to me almost every week, but I promise we are not, in fact, the same person.

I don't even own any pearls.

 

Comments

[HRH]

I love your perfect birth timing.

And now I just need the Fussy information....are we there yet?

[Kacie]

OMG! I love your story! I really hope my baby's birth goes that easy. "All I did was catch." Classic.

[Darla]

Awesome baby stories.

Hello Nashville? Hello?? Come in...or out as it were.

[Amy @ Milk Breath & Margaritas]

Hey there! I'm sitting in downtown Nashville not far from where Fussy is having Baby 5. Do please post as soon as you hear something!!!!

[Stacey @Real World Mom]

I love your story about giving birth. I was fairly lucky that way too. Great post, thanks for sharing! :-)

[MommyTime]

This is a beautiful post. I'm in the fast-birth camp too, and I can attest to the overwhelmingness of it all. (1.5 hrs from first contraction to "what's her name?" for number 2 -- also with a nurse who helpfully suggested I "just wait a few minutes" for the doctor to arrive after I said I needed to push. Funny lady.) I hope you post an update on Mrs. Fussypants when there is one. And thanks for the lovely guest post.

[karla ~ looking towards heaven]

You sound like me - I loved being pregnant and giving birth (in spite of the panic attacks towards the end of my last pregnancy)

And your second delivery totally sounds like my third child's delivery - end of the table wasn't on, husband caught him.

Aahhh, how I love birth stories. Sadly, I won't have any new ones, myself.

xo ~K

[Valarie Lea]

Oh, I can't wait!! I am so excited for her. I loved your story! I didn't have a difficult time giving birth either. Now Labor hurt and was pretty much awful, but the pushing part. I think I pushed like three times with all three of my kiddos. One of whom turns 8 today. :)

[Joy]

I love birth days- they are the best, most magical days!

[Kat]

Your story brought tears to my eyes. Wish I looked as hot as you at 8 months in a bikini - SO jealous!!!

[feener]

so sweet !!!

check out my blog for a great giveaway that you could give fussy !!

[karla ~ looking towards heaven]

oh, and now the photos! mercy - look at that cute baby!

Pregnant bellies are so fun to see! It's amazing that they can fill out like that, isn't it!

xo ~K

[Angella]

I LOVE birth stories! While I had an eight hour labout with my first, the following two were much faster. Two pushes each, to boot.

GREAT guest post :)

[Shannon]

Fussypants #5 and my #4 will share the same birthday. My babe turns 1 today. Goose's birth story sounds similar to mine. They were letting the dr. sleep. I screamed that the baby was coming out NOW, the nurses rolled their eyes which turned to shock and awe when they saw I wasn't kidding. Dr. ran in--although wasn't as thoughtful as your dr.--she charged me. I had no drugs (not because I wanted to)--but once Big B was in my arms all was right with the world.

Thinking of the Fussypants today as she gets to experience that first-time love all over again. I'm jealous.

[pgoodness]

this was a great post. Nice fill in job for fussypants!!

[Viv]

Just to let Fussy know (when it's finally happened!) that there were even people in Wales ( yes, we have that internet thingy here too!), waiting for news and praying for her. xxx

[VDog]

GO FUSSY, GO!! You rawk, girl.

And Megan? GREAT guest post. I love birth stories.

[Melizzard]

Great post Megan. I see links to you all the time here but resist adding one more awesome blog to my feedreader... clearly it's time to cave and become addicted to the Velveteen Mind

[mah-meeee]

holy .... and i thought i had quick deliveries... your delivery to baby goose was just amazing (and funny the way you told it.)

will go hop on over to your blog and check it out!

[Chrissy(aka spoiledmom)]

oooohhhh i love all the baby stories. both of mine weren't too bad.

First daughter -- epidural didn't take (okay, that was pretty bad, my niece claims I am the reason she is not having kids--she was outside the room and heard me screaming) LOL

daughter #2 came out in one push...

12 hour labor with each.

No more for me :(
so i will live vicariously through fussy and all of you who are preggers now...

Great post Megan!

[catnip]

Awesome birth stories! And yes, pitocin really is that painful...

[EMama]

My 1st wasn't easy or smooth at ALL, but I'm in for round 2. Except I had a pearl incident a few months ago. And I really wanted to be just like Fussy!

[Jennifer's Luvin Fussy]

If only I could forego the first nine months and the following 18 years I would have 20 bazillion kids. lol My deliveries were all relatively easy (I was very, very blessed). And my 3 beautiful girls all keep me very busy now. But I don't know what was worse the morning sickness or the constant "how are you feelings".

[ali]

haha. of course she's wearing pearls!! ;)

great post! and look at those belly shots! awesome!

[T with Honey]

I just read on twitter that #5 was born. Congratulations!!!!!!!!!!

[Peapodsquadmom]

Oh doggone it. I didn't want to get addicted to another blog...but...I'm going to have to add Velveteen Mind to my list. ;-) When am I ever going to clean my house?

[Angie]

What a beautiful story! I hated being pregnant, but reading your account almost makes me want to do it for a 3rd time. Almost. Thanks for sharing and I'll look forward to visiting your site!

[Darla]

Thanks for the update and adding new pictures. You were simply beautiful!

[Heather]

I love happy birth stories!!! You make it all sound so nice I might someday consider going through it all again, if only to have that moment where they put the baby on your chest. I missed that the first time around.

[Leslie]

My second baby was delivered on my back with a nurse holding my leg and screaming at me to "breathe". The Doctor was in the hall, putting on his gloves when my water broke(and hit the back wall), the beautiful baby came, and my husband said, "they measured her by calliber, not weight". :)

[Heather]

Great post, Megan! It was great to get to know you better.

And congrats, Fussy!! Did Mr. Smartypants survive too?

[Michelle]

Congrats to the Fussy family! Phew...I'm tired just thinking about it.

[alicia]

So happy for them! I loved your birthing stories. I cried. Thank you for babysitting us while Fussy's gone.

[mimipz5wjj]

What a sweet story!

Congratulations Fussypants and family!

[Lindaloohoo]

congrats to the fussy family!! fussy five, how nice :-)
i just wrote a post about wanting to be a mommy again, although thru adoption for me, but i also talked about the duggar family in arkansas. michelle duggar is pregnant with their EIGHTEENTH child right now . . . talk about walking right out and signing up for chores . . .
i'm off to check out the velveteen mind :-)

[rachel]

Megan, you are hysterical.
SO fun, I got to read you in two places :-) LOL.

Congratulations Alli honey!!!

[Mandy]

Megan, great post!

Fussy, CONGRATS on your sweet little man!!

[Sarcastic Mom]

YAY!

I'm so ready to see that baby. :-D

[(another) Alison]

Great birth stories. I'm on the opposite end of the spectrum from you: I consider my second labor short at 20 hours and that was only half the length of the first.

[Rachel]

Yay on the latest little man!

Hope all is well, and look forward to hearing more on the latest little Mr (Stinky?)pants

Rachel

[Alyssa]

Fabulous stories!! I am with you momma!! I am about to have baby number 3 in just 9 short weeks!! Maybe I can Twitter his birth??? Will someone blog about it for me?? Want the job??

[(another) Alison]

Great birth stories. I'm on the opposite end of the spectrum from you: I consider my second labor short at 20 hours and that was only half the length of the first.

[fullheartandhands mama]

Congrats Fussy!

[Christine (aka YoungMommy)]

Yay Fussypants!! Congratulations on your new baby boy.... I love boys! Having five myself, I'm glad you've joined my club. (There isn't one really, but we can start one, tight?)

Can't wait to see pics of the little guy!

~Christine

[Amy @ Milk Breath & Margaritas]

YEAH!!

Your preggers pics are too cute.

[Amy]

Whoohooo! Congratulations!!

Great birth stories and pictures too- loved it all!

[Kacie]

YAAAAAAAY! Baby is here! Woo hoo!

[The (Almost) Amazing Mammarino]

I REALLY enjoyed this post! I'm going to reread it many times. Beautiful . . .just beautiful.

[The (Almost) Amazing Mammarino]

And congratulations, Fussy!!!

[Beck]

HOORAY FOR FUSSY'S NEW BABY!
And it's so nice to read you for the first time! I love hearing about women who love going through labour, although after three babies I can safely say that I do not.